I, Mr. Kim, did not write the following article.
Dr. Kelly Flanagan, a licensed clinical psychologist and happy father of three, keeps a fantastic blog, full of wonderful opinions and personal advice. He has made a habit out of writing letters to his young daughter, to help teach her about the world. But not only his daughter could benefit from reading his wise words.
Dr. Kelly Flanagan, a licensed clinical psychologist and happy father of three, keeps a fantastic blog, full of wonderful opinions and personal advice. He has made a habit out of writing letters to his young daughter, to help teach her about the world. But not only his daughter could benefit from reading his wise words.
Check out what he
had to say about the make-up and fashion industry. They are great words to live
by.
Dear Little One,
As I write this, I’m sitting in the makeup aisle of our local
Target store. A friend recently texted me from a different makeup aisle and
told me it felt like one of the most oppressive places in the world. I wanted
to find out what he meant.
And now that I’m sitting here, I’m beginning to agree with him.
Words have power, and the words on display in this aisle have a deep power.
Words and phrases like:
Affordably gorgeous,
Infallible,
Flawless finish,
Brilliant strength,
Liquid power,
Age defying,
Instant age rewind,
Choose your dream,
Natural beauty.
When you have a daughter you
start to realize she’s just as strong as everyone else in the house—a force to
be reckoned with, a soul on fire with the same life and gifts and passions as
any man. But sitting in this store aisle, you also begin to realize most people
won’t see her that way. They’ll see her as a pretty face and a body to enjoy.
And they’ll tell her she has to look a certain way to have any worth or
influence.
But words do have power and
maybe, just maybe, the words of a father can begin to compete with the words of
the world. Maybe a father’s words can deliver his daughter through this
gauntlet of institutionalized shame and into a deep, unshakeable sense of her
own worthiness and beauty.
A father’s words aren’t
different words, but they are words with a radically different meaning:
Brilliant strength. May your strength be not
in your fingernails but in your heart. May you discern in your center who you
are, and then may you fearfully but tenaciously live it out in the world.
Choose your dream. But not from a department
store shelf. Find the still-quiet place within you. A real dream has been
planted there. Discover what you want to do in the world. And when you have
chosen, may you faithfully pursue it, with integrity and with hope.
Naked. The world wants you to take your clothes off. Please keep
them on. But take your gloves off. Pull no punches. Say what is in your heart.
Be vulnerable. Embrace risk. Love a world that barely knows what it means to
love itself. Do so nakedly. Openly. With abandon.
Infallible. May you be constantly,
infallibly aware that infallibility doesn’t exist. It’s an illusion created by
people interested in your wallet. If you choose to seek perfection, may it be
in an infallible grace—for yourself, and for everyone around you.
Age defying. Your skin will wrinkle
and your youth will fade, but your soul is ageless. It will always know how to
play and how to enjoy and how to revel in this one-chance life. May you always
defiantly resist the aging of your spirit.
Flawless finish. Your finish has nothing
to do with how your face looks today and everything to do with how your life
looks on your last day. May your years be a preparation for that day. May you
be aged by grace, may you grow in wisdom, and may your love become big enough
to embrace all people. May your flawless finish be a peaceful embrace of the
end and the unknown that follows, and may it thus be a gift to everyone who
cherishes you.
Little One, you love everything
pink and frilly and I will surely understand if someday makeup is important to
you. But I pray three words will remain more important to you—the last three
words you say every night, when I ask the question: “Where are you the most
beautiful?” Three words so bright no concealer can cover them.
Where are you the most
beautiful?
On the inside.
From my heart to yours,
Daddy
To see more of Dr. Flanagan’s writings, check out his blog. This man has a
good head on his shoulders, more of us could stand to have his kind of good
sense.
Kelly Flanagan also has a free ebook out, called The Marriage Manifesto:
Turning Your World Upside Down. If you like what he wrote in this
letter, you should probably check it out.
Source: Dr. Kelly Flanagan
